Home
Stolen Meme   
02:23am 06/11/2009
  I stole this meme while reading some very old entries of [info]statikk

WRITE YOUR LJ USER NAME WITH THE FOLLOWING:
nose: sjn8yygglecat
elbow: snuigglefcat
tongue: snugglecat
chin: zs nbuhjyvvgf,lsd cxzftgr
feet: dsnugglecat
eyes closed and one finger: smugglexar
back of my hand: swjniu8ggle4cxfawt
palm: snugglecvasty
mouse: snutgglecat
wrist: sn ugglecat


Whoo, makes me wish I had chosen a shorter username, or a name with letters not so close to the spacebar. I'm sure the rest of you will do much better though. :)
 
     Read 1 - Post
 
Famous Poems Rewritten as Limericks   
08:17pm 09/09/2009
  Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening

There once was a horse-riding chap
Who took a trip in a cold snap
He stopped in the snow
But he soon had to go:
He was miles away from a nap.

The Raven

There once was a girl named Lenore
And a bird and a bust and a door
And a guy with depression
And a whole lot of questions
And the bird always says "Nevermore."

Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night

There was an old father of Dylan
Who was seriously, mortally illin'
"I want," Dylan said
"You to bitch till you're dead.
"I'll be cheesed if you kick it while chillin'."

I Wandered Lonely As a Cloud

There once was a poet named Will
Who tramped his way over a hill
And was speechless for hours
Over some stupid flowers
This was years before TV, but still.

Footprints in the Sand

There was a man who, at low tide
Would walk with the Lord by his side
Jesus said "Now look back;
You'll see one set of tracks.
That's when you got a piggy-back ride."

Courtesy of http://badgods.com/limerickpoems.html
 
     Post
 
Silly Tests   
11:18pm 01/06/2009
 

Your result for The Heart Test...


Slave to Emotions



The Slave to Emotions

Dependent, Idealistic, Intimate, Indulgent


You are the most emotional of hearts, the Slave to Your Emotions. You crave love, and have high standards for love. You are very intimate and value harmony with a mate. Sometimes you may feel that you are over-emotional and see this as a curse at times, because you are so emotionally-charged, and you so greatly desire love. You might want to break the emotional chains that bind you, but find that the ideals of love and intimacy are firmly shackled to you and cannot be severed.


Matches for the Slave to Emotions:


The Bleeding Heart

The Bleeding Heart is idealistic and indulgent as you are, and just as love-needy, making for lots of shared common ground. You'll also find the Bleeding Heart to be more passionate and fun-loving, something that at first might turn you off, but you will find this will provide a perfect balance to your intimate nature.


The Heart of Gold

The Heart of Gold values harmony and unity just as you do, and shares your ideals of love and intimacy, but is more independent. The Heart of Gold will never leave you and always be there to love you, and this above all else you will appreciate. The Heart of Gold's loving nature will make you feel as if you have found someone to help carry your rattling emotional chains, and that they are glad to do it.


The Patron Saint's Heart

The Patron Saint's Heart craves love just as you do and value harmony and togetherness as well, but is more down-to-earth and passionate than you. However, you will value these more sensual qualities, and the Patron Saint's more protective and loving nature will make you feel loved needed, something value greatly.




Your exact opposite is The Lord's Heart.




Avoid Explicits when possible. They're open and frank nature is contrary to yours. You may also want to avoid Independents unless they have other qualities you seek to balance them out, as you are a person who craves closeness with another person.


Take The Heart Test
at HelloQuizzy

 
     Post
 
Rational arguments against gay marriage   
12:49am 29/04/2009
  1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in the world.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans


Probably needless to say, I didn't write this. I found it on http://www.2m4m.org/ which I found in a roundabout fashion after watching http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/17/the-colbert-coalitions-an_n_188124.html.
 
     Read 1 - Post
 
Rainbow   
04:18pm 02/12/2008
 
Your rainbow is intensely shaded gray, violet, and green.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

What is says about you: You are a creative person. You feel strong ties to nature and your mood changes with its cycles. Those around you admire your fresh outlook and vitality. You depend on modern technology and may feel uncomfortable without it.

Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.
 
     Post
 
I am I, Don Quijote!   
09:54pm 18/10/2008
  Another day, another test. One om my favorite movies is Man of La Mancha, and one of my favorite songs is The Impossible Dream, so I had to share that I scored as Don Quijote in The Literary Character Test.

Your result for The Literary Character Test...

Don Quixote


Don Quixote, the man who would be a knight despite all that the world tries to tell him, is a powerful and mighty figure, if only in his mind. His surreal imagination, and the way he wholeheartedly believes the strange apparitions that he conjures up unconsiously, make him powerful. His willpower makes him an unstoppable force, no matter how many times he may fail. He may not succeed, but he will never cease to battle on for what is righteous and true.

Take The Literary Character Test at HelloQuizzy

 
     Read 2 - Post
 
I'm up! I'm up!   
01:11pm 08/10/2008
 
mood: grumpy
I had a glass of water poured on me when I tried to sleep in today, after a 12+ hour day yesterday. I remember distinctly remember saying the only plan I had for today was to sleep in. When Matt's up, he wants me up too, as we are both doing the job hunt thing now.

Cold and wet and cold. *grump*
 
     Post
 
Vocab   
10:19pm 07/09/2008
  I started reading a new book. It is called Perdido Street Station by China Mièville and three pages in I am already reaching for the dictionary.

"A line of sunken houses, built on the wrong side of the wall, pressed up against the bank in the water, their bituminous black bricks dripping."
bituminous:Of the nature of or resembling bitumen, consisting of or containing bitumen.
bitumen: Originally, a kind of mineral pitch found in Palestine and Babylon, used as mortar, etc. The same as asphalt, mineral pitch
...
"He is wittering gruffly in triumph and ushering me quickly ashore and away and I alight, as slowly as if onto coals, picking my way through the rubbish and the broken glass."
wittering: To chatter or mutter; to grumble; to speak with annoying lengthiness on trivial matters.
...
"The gates to the Old City, once grandiose, now psoriatic and ruined."
psoriatic: Of, relating to, or associated with psoriasis; affected with psoriasis.
psoriasis: Originally: any of various scaly or scabby diseases of the skin (cf. PSORA n.). In later use: spec. a skin disorder which has a hereditary component and is characterized by the presence of well-circumscribed erythematous patches covered with silvery scales, esp. on the elbows, knees, and scalp, and is associated with excessively rapid proliferation of keratinocytes.


Um...yeah. Thank you OED and thanks to SJSU library for the account to use it.

Even if I don't enjoy the book I will expand my vocabulary. And also thanks to Dr. Cox for teaching me that it is never okay to not look up a word I don't know.
 
     Read 7 - Post
 
Intelligent Design Debate   
05:06pm 31/07/2008
  I found this while going through the saved drafts in my email account. Enjoy.

The only debate on Intelligent Design that is worthy of its subject

Moderator: We're here today to debate the hot new topic, evolution versus Intelligent Des--- (Scientist pulls out baseball bat.)

Moderator: Hey, what are you doing? (Scientist breaks Intelligent Design advocate's kneecap.) Intelligent Design advocate: YEAAARRRRGGGHHHH! YOU BROKE MY KNEECAP!

Scientist: Perhaps it only appears that I broke your kneecap. Certainly, all the evidence points to the hypothesis I broke your kneecap. For example, your kneecap is broken; it appears to be a fresh wound; and I am holding a baseball bat, which is spattered with your blood. However, a mere preponderance of evidence doesn't mean anything. Perhaps your kneecap was designed that way. Certainly, there are some features of the current situation that are inexplicable according to the "naturalistic" explanation you have just advanced, such as the exact contours of the excruciating pain that you are experiencing right now.

Intelligent Design advocate: AAAAH! THE PAIN!

Scientist: Frankly, I personally find it completely implausible that the random actions of a scientist such as myself could cause pain of this particular kind. I have no precise explanation for why I find this hypothesis implausible --- it just is. Your knee must have been designed that way!

Intelligent Design advocate: YOU BASTARD! YOU KNOW YOU DID IT!

Scientist: I surely do not. How can we know anything for certain? Frankly, I think we should expose people to all points of view. Furthermore, you should really re-examine whether your hypothesis is scientific at all: the breaking of your kneecap happened in the past, so we can't rewind and run it over again, like a laboratory experiment. Even if we could, it wouldn't prove that I broke your kneecap the previous time. Plus, let's not even get into the fact that the entire universe might have just popped into existence right before I said this sentence, with all the evidence of my alleged kneecap-breaking already pre-formed.

Intelligent Design advocate: That's a load of bullshit sophistry! Get me a doctor and a lawyer, not necessarily in that order, and we'll see how that plays in court!

Scientist (turning to audience): And so we see, ladies and gentlemen, when push comes to shove, advocates of Intelligent Design do not actually believe any of the arguments that they profess to believe. When it comes to matters that hit home, they prefer evidence, the scientific method, testable hypotheses, and naturalistic explanations. In fact, they strongly privilege naturalistic explanations over supernatural hocus-pocus or metaphysical wankery. It is only within the reality-distortion field of their ideological crusade that they give credence to the flimsy, ridiculous arguments which we so commonly see on display. I must confess, it kind of felt good, for once, to be the one spouting free-form bullshit; it's so terribly easy and relaxing, compared to marshaling rigorous arguments backed up by empirical evidence. But I fear that if I were to continue, then it would be habit-forming, and bad for my soul. Therefore, I bid you adieu.
 
     Post
 
Pool trick shots   
06:11pm 12/05/2008
  Okay, I'm not even into pool and I thought this was way awesome.
Incredible Trick Shots

EDIT: If you are easily offended you should turn off your sound before playing this video. They have some stupid and completely unrelated song playing on this page.
 
     Read 1 - Post
 
An Excerpt   
12:46am 09/05/2008
  I wrote this story for my ENGL 130 class. It is my first attempt at writing non-fictiony type fiction. I am thinking of it as expanding my boundaries instead of playing to the fact that my teacher writes historical fiction and memoirs.

A Mother’s Love

 

            It was springtime, or nearly so. Small white crocuses were blooming outside the window in small snowflakes of white on a skirt of that new green, a sign of new life everywhere. The last traces of the winter snows were fast disappearing from the mountains just visible over the trees beyond her little clearing. Birds called out warnings and imprecations to each other as well as the reddish squirrel she decided to call Tony, after the Tritonia flower that was nearly the same shade as that rascal who was forever racing around the corner of a tree and thieving the bread crumbs she had scattered earlier that morning right from under the beaks from the fluttering feathered jewels.

Anna let out a sigh of contentment at the peace and solitude of her cottage in the woods. It was too good a day, she decided, to waste indoors. Too good a day to waste on her responsibilities. Her eyes swept her room, lingering on the signs that she had been slacking in her housekeeping. Shirts were strewn carelessly on the floor wherever she had undressed, a nearly empty coffee mug and a crumb-strewn plate sat on the nightstand next to her bed where she had indulged herself with a late night snack in bed. Mmm…homemade brownies, meltingly warm and oozing with the extra semi-sweet chocolate chips she had sprinkled on top as an afterthought. The sheets would certainly need to be washed as there were undoubtedly crumbs. On the other side of her bed was the baby’s crib. Anna walked slowly past the navy silk shirt she wore three days ago, and the jeans from yesterday. She ran her fingers through tousled hair and slid her feet into some wooly slippers and headed out of her room and through the kitchen. She hadn’t bothered to clean up last night’s brownie experiment, but she could get to that later. She swiped another brownie and a napkin and headed out the solid pine door to the great world outside.

The birds scattered the moment she opened the front door. Treading carefully to avoid stepping on the wildflowers, Anna walked over to the bench on the side of the old grey wishing well, leaning her touseled head against the smooth warmth of the sun-warmed stone. This had been her favorite spot as a child. The birds chirped overhead. She knew that a few minutes of inactivity on her part and the bright yellow birds would come swooping out of the trees like drops of sunshine and begin again their welcome to springtime.

A wail cut through her contentment and into her heart like the sound of her lover’s voice that night he had said goodbye, leaving her six moths pregnant. A fierce scowl furrowed her heavy black brows, and a little line creased her otherwise flawless forehead. She told herself to calm down and stop scowling. She didn’t want a face seamed with wrinkles, not at her age. She was only twenty-four. An image of her mother’s face, lined in a scowl as she pored through legal documents flashed through her head. She took after her mother. She had the same chocolate-brown hair, the same slanted nose, rosy lips just a shade on the thin side, perhaps from being pursed in anger. A cold anger that shut down reason, attacked with icy javelins. Anna sighed as she heard another cry from her infant. She reached into the pocket of her blue jeans and pulled out her cell-phone.

“Hartfield Law, Susan speaking.” Her mother sounded distracted, as was usual. She would have just gotten back from her lunch break and was now catching up on any messages she had missed. Another phone call right now would undoubtedly be unwelcome. Anna smiled.

“Hiya Mom. I can call back if you’re too busy…” For me she added silently as she waited for her mother to respond. There was a slight pause, confirming her suspicion that her mother really didn’t want to talk to her right now.

“I’ve got a few minutes before I meet with some clients, how can I help you Anna?” Susan asked politely.

“It’s about Daisy, actually. She doesn’t ever stop crying. I’m not even sure she sleeps. She’s like that creepy psycho kid in The Ring. She just never stops.”

“Well, have you tried talking to someone about it?”

“I’m asking you, mom. What should I do?”

“Well, I think you ought to get some professional help.”

“What, like a nanny? I guess I could do that. Some people actually like kids well enough to look after them even when they aren’t theirs. It takes all kinds right? Listen, I have to go shut that little monster up. I’ll see you next time you’re in the country. And thanks for letting me stay here for a while. I do appreciate it.” Anna hung up the phone, guilty for snapping at her mother who had been kind enough to suggest that she stay here at the family cottage while she recovered from her pregnancy. And while she learned how to deal with having to be responsible all the time.

Again an infant’s cry sounded, and Anna pressed her hands to her ears to block out that sound. It wasn’t a sound, really. Nothing that loud could come from something that small. It wasn’t her baby at all; it was a jet engine whirring up, or an air raid siren signaling the start of the third world war. “It’s okay baby, Mommy’s here.” Anger tinged the next heartfelt wail, and Anna looked one last time out her bedroom window at the birds oblivious to anything but the food before closing the warm wooden shutters and turning around. “I’m coming sweetheart, I’m coming.” Yet another sound she could no longer pretend was anything other than her miserable infant assaulted her eardrums. She made her way slowly around the corner of the bed and approached the cradle. “Hush now. Hush.” She paused a moment and looked at the open door of her bedroom. She could hear the birds outside, the rustling of leaves, and the happy chattering of squirrels. It would be so easy to just go away, leave the mess for another time. Another piercing shriek drowned out the melody of nature, and Anna gave in with poor grace. Fury in her every stride she stomped the last few steps to the cradle. “Will you just shut up?! For one minute?” Leaning over the edge of the cradle Anna glared at the empty blankets from which the disembodied wail seemed to originate. “Will you never shut up?”

 
     Post
 
   
04:47am 25/04/2008
  Can't sleep.

Not worried about cannibalistic clowns, just can't sleep.
 
     Post
 
I can has cheezburger?   
09:29pm 18/03/2008
  funny pictures
see more crazy cat pics
 
     Post
 
Merry Christmas   
07:49pm 25/12/2007
  Merry Christmas Everyone  
     Post
 
For My Literary Friends   
08:50am 27/10/2007
  So, there's this thing called FreeRice

I tried to find it on snopes, but it was not there. Basically, you see a word and four possible definitions for that word, and you click on the right one and the United Nations Food Program will donate 10 grains of rice to the hungry. It costs nothing to play, they don't request any personal information, and if you get an answer wrong, the only thing that happens is they give you the correct answer and ask you to try again. I haven't hit an upper limit on the amount of rice that they will donate, but then again I am only at 350 grains of rice. I'll admit, there are quite a few words I didn't know, but I am having fun with it. I also know a lot of my friends out there are as good or better than I am, so I thought I would bring this to your attention and see if you want to give it a shot.

Right now I am on ghee, which either means hobby, snake-like, jetty, or clarified butter. I think I will have to guess...CORRECT! Ghee means clarified butter. Yay for ending world hunger, or at least trying to do something about it.
 
     Post
 
My Wand   
11:30am 08/09/2007
 

Wood type: holly
Length: 11 inches
Core: Unicorn Hair

get your own wand!





Yay! I got the unicorn hair!
 
     Post
 
Why You Should/n't Wander the Internet   
07:40pm 04/09/2007
  There are some very odd things out there in the internet. Today I have found just a few, which my overly creative friends probably already know about. Here are a few samples.



The Holy Fred Toast Stamper



Pro Thumb Wrestling



and Beef Bandages!
 
     Post
 
From the mouth of Regina Brett   
10:56am 25/08/2007
 

To celebrate growing older, Regina Brett of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland ,

Ohio once wrote the 45 lessons life taught her.  It is the most-requested

column she ever wrote. These are the two that rang most true to me.

18. A writer writes.  If you want to be a writer, write.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick.  Your friends

will.  Stay in touch.

 
     Post
 
Battle Cry   
08:43pm 10/08/2007
  For your very own (silly) battle cry, go here: http://chaz.bdmonkeys.net/battle.php

I didn't like mine, so I tried Someone Special.

Sprinting across the cliffs, wielding a jeweled meat hammer, cometh Someone Special! And he gives a booming bellow:

"For the love of beatings, I slice through beating hearts until everything has croaked!!!"
 
     Post
 
Another cat/english joke   
02:13am 30/07/2007
  Q: What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
A: One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause.
 
     Post
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Advertisement